The Crocodile that never was!

Mapombi, too, is now convinced that a crocodile and a lizard are two different reptiles. Totally different and have no similarities whatsoever except that they are all reptiles. Kkkkkkkkk iyi yamunoti Ngwena iyi haisi zvachose. Chidhambakura ichi  kkkkkkk gwavava chairo!

When we were growing up kwedu kwaChirimudombo uko we used to know that a crocodile is the most dangerous reptile, with some cases of livestock and even human beings devoured by crocodiles in rivers and dams. This is the kind of crocodiles Mapombi has ever known. And lizards are harmless; in fact, they run for cover in caves each time they come across livestock and human beings. 

Mapombi had pinned hope for economic turnaround on Emmerson ‘Ngwena’ Mnangagwa but the recent developments in Zanu PF made me conclude that this guy is not really like a crocodile as his name may suggest. Hakuna ngwena yakadai, never! Nhadha kurambira pachiPutukezi!

We all know Ngwena haidye chebamba asi chayo chinouyaka neronga nhai. How can a mere Mandiitawepi Chimene publicly humiliated and attacked Mnangagwa and the Zanu PF’s second in command remained quiet. Just three months ago it happened again when Sarah Mahoka likened Ngwena to a duckie kkkkkkkkk hanzi baba musaita sedhakisi kkkkkk asi Mahoka so ka! Ukawana nguva utiitire mushe handika?

Mandiitawepi accused Mnangagwa of leading both the Tshlotsho declaration in 2004 and Team Lacoste. Ndokujairirwa nepwereka uku. Pwere kutambira chitsvambe mudziva rine ngwena shuwa and go scot free. When we were growing up we were told dziva guru idiva kamwe ukadzokera kepiri unowana ngwena dzasvinura!  But mapombi has since realized that was a lie Ngwena hadzisvinure zvekumhanya. Mahoka akadhidha, Chimene akadzokera kepiri akangowana dzakavata ngwena and now vana Kasukuwere nana Zhuwao twava kutouyawo. E-eh ko kutyei  when they have realized that the Croc is not real.

As if that is not enough, Chris Mutsvangwa was axed for supporting Mnangagwa, Victor Matemadanda and Douglas Mahiya were arrested for publicly announcing their allegiance to Mnangagwa. Matemadanda and mahiya are being persecuted because they believe that Mugabe, who is turning 93 years old in the next six months, should retire and be replaced by Ngwena. 

But instead of supporting these fellow comrades who are fighting for a noble cause, Ngwena distanced self from Team Lacoste and even referred to the War vets’ actions as irresponsible. Kkkkkkkkk kutoita kapress conference to disregard fellow Cdes.

Kkkkkkkk Mahoka was very right; “Baba musaita sedhakisi rinopedzerwa vana rakatarisa richingoti wo-oooh. Kkkkkk pambili naCde Mahoka! Mapombi used to admire Ngwena but the recent developments made her to withdraw her allegiance forthwith – kufira mafufu segonzo handichade. Puu-u ndachera chikomba ndapfira handichazozvipamha futi kusupporter Ngwena.  Mapombi has since discovered that zizi harina nyanga inzeve!

Those who still think of supporting Ngwena please do so at your own peril ini kufira mahara handichada! At least G40 protects its cdes. Iyezvino vari kupanana maresidential stands everywhere but Team Lacoste hakuna zviriko.  Gogo Mahofa had tried to reward Team Lacoste members by allocating them sugarcane farms in the Lowveld but Bob akazviramba. 

Mapombi is a gentleman handivanzi kufira kureva zvingava nani pakadai. We used to hear of sellouts during the liberation war. Mapombi is convinced sellouts are still there even in present today. Masvingo province has made it known even to Mugabe and Dr Grace that they support Mnangagwa to take over. Midlands too declared their allegiance to Ngwena too. And the genuine war vets are for Mnangagwa but, alas, the Croc distanced self from these people. Kkkkkk pane kutengesa kunodarika ikoku? Kkkkk Mapombi now knows kuti the only Makaranga who were brave in Zanu PF were Edson Zvobgo and Dzikamai Mavhaire chete. Mavhaire said Mugabe Must Go! 

Mavhaire and Zvobgo were true brave cdes kwete izvi zvatava kuoneswa izvi.  Anyway, what else can one expect from Makaranga except bootlicking?  Kkkkkkk kubva munhu atya Mandiitawepi Chimene to that extent? Kkkkkkk inga zvakaoma.

Mapombi would like to make it clear; from today onwards she has stopped forthwith supporting Ngwena because she realized that he has no people at heart. Ngwena left Mahiya, Matemadanda, Mutsvangwa, Mahofa nana Josaya hungwe when they needed him the most, and for this reason, mapombi decided to end her marriage with Ngwena. Mapombi also realized that Ngwena is in fact a fake Croc; he is in actual a lizard. Hakuna Ngwena inotya kudai! 

Aa-h it’s almost lunch time regai ndiende zvangu kwedu kuDr Grace Trading Centre ndindokanga hangu maputi angu for lunch. By the way maticha akazowana here salary pamwe vanganditengerawo some rotten bananas? I miss rotten bananas hey! Musaseka; hazvisekesi izvi. Mapombi never dreamed of this kind of life yekurara muma plastic iyi nekudya rotten bananas and maputi but many thanks to Mugabe government. Zvichaiwanawo ngwarati! One day is one day. Regai zvavo vaneropa remari vana Mphoko vadye isu takati vava but manje manje tichajamuka chete nekuti maguta kunyarwa. Mboko imboko!