Welcome back Mr President

Mapombi is beginning to doubt the saying yekuti experience is the best teacher, infact it is not. After all, I thought ED with the experience he had in government before he became the president, he now knows what to do and what not to. However, he seems to have learnt nothing. Kukundwa naHichilema sure achangopinda who went to Scotland with a very lean entourage and secured bilateral agreements chero tisati taziva hedu zvavaisaina saina kkkk. Vedu ava had a big team but I don’t think besides kumwa zvavo whiskey, there is any other thing that he brought back. I will come back to this but for now let me talk about this other president of ours. The president of the Chief’s council Fortune Charumbira or should we call him Headman? Because haa haachinaka nzvimbo yekutonga. Bere took away a bigger chunk and when we thought that was enough, Nemamwa came in full force also vying for another portion of his land. I used to think he is clever especially with his post in the Pan African council. However, he has since joined the bandwagon of crazy people, the likes of anaMthuli Ncube and company. Hanzi Zanu PF belong to the Chiefs kkkkk, it belongs to him and the other like-minded. Chinopenga chete chikomana chiya. How can he say Zanu PF belong to them iyo isingatomudi. Charumbira aidiwa neOld dispensation yaUncle Robert na sisi Gire aka Dr Stop it, not these guys, they are the ones vari kuda kutomupedza. Mnangagwa resuscitated the Bere Chieftaincy achangopinda. It is one of the first things he did, I am not sure hangu kuti akatanga chii kumutsa Ushe hwekwaBere kana kuchinja scud achiunza ichi chaakunzi chiMnangagwa ichi kkkkk. Iwe Charumbira stop meddling in Zanu PF politics and do your constitutional mandate, the constitution stipulates that Chiefs should not be involved into politics hence be apolitical but iwe uri chibaba chazvo.
Mapombi wanted to welcome the president on his return from Scotland so that she can see for herself if he really came empty handed. I hear a lot of people saying dzakauya dzakarembedza maoko neScarf bedzi and I wanted to see for myself because people are now good at lying kkkk. Hanzi I wanted to ask him if it is true that he addressed empty chairs or it was a photo shopped picture kkkk. Sure randakaratidzwa kuno kuchitima kana risiri cropped or warped sure maiva musina vanhu. However, I heard others saying the slot he was given yaiva isina vanhu apa we were not given the reason why. Hanzi even the likes of ana Boris presented musina vanhu so hameno ikoko.
I would like to say welcome back our president, ko makatiigirawo here ma Glenfiddich amaisunda mumaTrolley, but doro riyaka, ndoda kumborinzwawo because mmmm, I hear even pano paBenjamin apa ukangoenda naro haa wapinda kkkk. Kune vamwe vandoziva vakatopinda nekuda kwaro kkkk. I hope the sanctions issue was addressed, because the Crocodile managed to have time to sit down with Biden and Boris zvekuti I don’t think we will have them for the next few months, I think vanenge vabvisa. Yeah, that was the most opportune time you would ever have Mr president, talking to them eye to eye. If there was need for you to kneel and beg I hope you really did because you have been telling us that they are the ones affecting us as Zimbabweans and most of the people believed you kusiya kwangu and a few who know the truth.
But what is it with our politicians guys, I thought it’s only Chamisa who was excited by meeting team iro kkkk. Chete the Youngman met the administration not the real guy. But Mr President I know, unlike Hichilema you didn’t sign any deal there but at least you were supposed to bring the Scottish whisky, even iya inonzi Scottish Leader zvayo, it was better. Dai makatovati vazovhura imwe plant yeScottish Leader kuno because I see zvemukumbi mozvifarira izvi, barely a week after opening Amarula plant kwamakazora mafuta eshomhwe, you were welcomed to bottles paGlasgow kkk. I wanted you to ask them to open another plant paZaka apa coz mapfura aripowo futi. But I think when the president came back, he had hangover of the wines he took on the parties organised for him and his entourage in Glasgow. I heard our president had the largest entourage ikoko kkkk, apa Gasgow yacho is the most populous city in Scotland kkkkk. Hanzi you all saw that I talked to Boris, hanzi he did not only stretch his hand to greet me, vakanyemwerera vakanyemwerera kkkk. Kufarira smile sure haa I can see the level of immaturity in our leaders. Do we eat smile yaBorison nhai Mr President? How can you get that overzealous?
Ko vakomana mava papi neMota yaChamisa kkk, I last heard kuti panga pava ne US$2 000 yoga, mmm if that’s true inogona hayo kukwana next year December unless muchida fun Cargo coz with the pace ikufamba nemadonations acho, mmm pakaipa. Please Machinja itai serious mutengere president mota kwayo. I am still weighing options kuti ndichavhotera ani hangu in 2023 so count me out for now. I heard again that Chamisa did not report the attempted murder to police, apawo Ass Com Nyathi is saying they are not manje toita waani Mutape.
Before I go hangu kunokanga maputi angu for lunch, let me come closer home and please hear me out. Manyanga and company please spare us the crap, regai Rujeko school ivakwe and take your political rivalry somewhere else. I know the issue is not about Nyokanhete not following procedure but countering propaganda by Musekiwa who was claiming that he facilitated the construction of the school through CDF. The matter is not between Nyokanhete and ladies and gentlemen, vana Manyanga are trying to soil Musekiwa’s name since he is hoping for a comeback in council if by elections are okayed. Speaking of by elections, who is holding the keys to that much awaited election. People are rightfully waiting and ZEC yanaChigumba is saying they are waiting for a go ahead from the Ministry of health and the ministry is saying its ZEC’s call. Hatisisi kutambwa here apa, this blame game is benefiting Zanu PF at the expense of the population. So ana Manayanga tikukuzivai hedu you always want to cause confusion. I heard others saying Manyanga and Chiteme are dull kkkk. I tried to tell them kuti Manyanga is learned, he graduated from Border Gezi and is a full time Green Bomber so you need to accept who he is kkkk. Hanzi Manyanga ndochilocal rigging machine zvekuti the faction supporting Mavenyengwa should make sure that Manyanga is nowhere near the voting centers on the day of the provincial elections or else havalume.
Asi nhai vanhu, can someone tell me what’s going on with our country, the way people are killing each other mmmm. Every month we hear of people killing a number of innocent souls. Zvimwe hazvichada mapurisa asi kutoti mweya mutsvene chaiwo. MaPrayer warrios where are you while Satan is haunting us? Ko ava maporofita 8 vokufira tsvimbo what were they really up to.Why is it that province yekumusha kwaPresident iyo Midlands ndiyo yainda nenyika saTocky panyaya yekupondana? Asi ndeyambuya Nehanda here tsvimbo yacho or yaRobert iyo yakaita kuti ade kuvhukunyugwa.
Ko mandiitawefodya Chimene makazodii naye nhai maCdes? I miss her with her red eyes dzakarohwa nembanje. Please if anyone comes across her, greet her for me. Ko hapanawo anoziva kunaMboko futi here, I wanted to tell him to facilitate that we get some chicks here for Xmas. Ana profeeds are failing to meet the demand kkkk. Mboko Imboko