Ladies and gentlemen, I hope very soon we will all be breathing a sigh of relief, especially those in Harare after the departure of our esteemed guests who came for the SADC summit. The ruling cabal is in seventh heaven, amazed at how much they can do when it is time to stroke each other’s ego with the rest of the gang from across Southern Africa. The regional body, which has over the years been proving it’s uselessness when it comes to the will of the people is once again endorsing Baba Two, and I hear they will not be given any small chance to see the other side of the Zimbabwean life. I saw Joji celebrating the Media briefing room at the airport like an impressionable child, hanzi zvidobidobi, kkkk how silly! He himself is even surprised about what the Zanu government can do when it is in the mood. It’s as if they are showing off to other Presidents in the SADC region like primary school kids, all at the expense of the general citizenry. Hospitals are in a dire state, with giving birth becoming more of a death trap. I thought Baba Two’s establishment will at least have some shame after billionaire Masiiwa and wife donated maternity equipment to Pari and Mbuya Nehanda hospitals, especially with the amount, just a quarter million which to them is a drop in the ocean, considering all the natural resources they steal, but they would not flinch, unless it’s concerning power and being made SADC chairman. If it was the government buying that equipment, we will be hearing of tens if not hundreds of millions USD. Nothing else matters to Zanu anymore. They had to attempt to create a little African heaven for people who actually know how bad things are in this country—those who claim not to know among the SADC leaders are simply clowning like they are used to. After all they are such a circus and have been so for a long time. Even the City of Harare, which is known for gross incompetence is in on it, seized with beautifying the city as if they have the capacity to maintain it. Such a bunch of clowns! Harare, a place known to be a huge rubbish bin being beautified, kkkkk, I wish I had bus fare, I would board Sarapavana tomorrow morning to go see how much beautification has happened in the Sunshine city that is no more. At least these days in Harare council meetings they have something of substance to discuss, rather than corruption and making resolutions that mean nothing to residents but just fleecing them of their hard earned money. I bet the heads-of-states will go back to their countries thinking Zimbabwe has become more of a holiday destination, chazongoshota is the beach and a few more things. Cupcake Ramaphosa needed a holiday after the SA elections fiasco, after which he will go back and mock people from other countries like we saw him doing during the Olympics. He might even whisper into Baba MaTwins’ ear to remind him how much his country’s economy is being carried on the backs of Zimbabwean immigrants, yet they are being hunted like rats by his people. To him it’s more like Christmas paruzevha, kkkk haa zvemuTeapot country medu umu zvakaoma. I saw some government workers from Mthuli’s ministry parading a ‘state-of-the-art’ bus, with an interior that looks like that of a home, all meant to drive the visitors around. You could hear by the excitement in their voices that these people have become so used to the bottom-of-the-pit Zim standards they don’t even realize how absurd that is. Varume vakuru squealing like piglets over a bus. Surely we deserve Zanu, at this rate. Even good old ZESA supply improved, as if people can afford having it, with how the tariffs have become so high. Baba MaTwins became so obsessed with this SADC chairmanship to a point where he even locked up voices of dissent, talk of sweeping anything considered as dirt in his delusions under the rug. The paranoia even pushed the cabal to lock up tourists for just saying they couldn’t shave because there was no power nor water. If it was in a country that actually works, the lodge where the tourist was allegedly recording the video from would be investigated thoroughly, even closed for not having such basic things like water, but who cares in a Banana Republic? We have normalized a lot of abnormal things, that’s why Zanu always takes us for granted. Just look at how as a country we have normalized begging—the number of people begging for medical assistance shows you that we have indeed given up on our health system. Yet the government, which a few months ago was also begging for US$2 billion is the same one doing major renovations for a summit that lasted a few days. Unotoshaya kuti zvirikumbofamba sei.
I hear Gozo is back like musana at council, demanding that he be given yet another chance of chowing residents’ money. I do not know who in their right senses makes those decisions kuLocal Government Board uko, because this looks like daylight robbery on the residents’ part. This is going to cost council an arm and a leg, costs that we all know are transferred to ratepayers by default. Haa munombovadya vagari senge munodya harugwa zvenyu. It all sounds like well-calculated racketeering, but what gets to me is the entitlement to ratepayers funds they have—demanding thousands while service delivery is at its worst to say the least. Apparently it is not only Wicknell who is benefitting from the brokenness of the system, it starts from those we live with, makanzura edu iwaya, and whenever they find a chance they loot. Mapombi once said local authorities are the mother of all corruption in this country. Matownhouse mazhinji if not all, are crime scenes I tell you. I Kanzuro yacho is sticking to its resolution hanzi Gozo hatidi kumuona and in all this fight who sufferes? It’s the grass ofcoz kkk.
Anyway, let me go ndinokanga maputi angu zvangu for lunch, these days the rotten bananas are becoming less and less, ndichatomboinda paTanaiwa apoo. ZiG is still very elusive for us vagabonds, and it seems Mthuli naMshayazano have gone AWOL as well. Shadow finance minister KD muzaya waMafidi is the one we see here and there. Let’s hope General Chandaizment will give us some action before the year ends because I really miss the drama of endless press conferences, when cdes called each other sellouts what not. I am always looking forward to Zanu drama; ko ndiyoka our only hope because opposition is as dead as a dodo. Nero wacho sometimes acts like a flip-flopper or a clown, or both. His cult of followers same same.
Have you guys seen Jonono recently? Netizens no longer fancy him, which has rendered him irrelevant. There is an unspoken rule on the internet that if you want to go irrelevant faster than you ever imagined, support musangano wekuyera uyu, wanaMai Welly. Baba naMai Baby Boy Nevy Mutsvangwa are also missing in action these days, maybe it’s SADC yakati kuuya iyi. Let’s hope they are not cooking something somewhere quietly and cunningly like we saw that other time. If you see VaMphoko my friend ask him how it feels to be on the sidelines vamwe vachidya SADC paHarare apo,kkkk. Until next week, mboko imboko!
