Melanin Black Queen
No one would ever write down a
plan to be broke, weak, less courageous, to be segregated, be a failure or any
other negative things. We all have dreams, set goals, and ambitions because we
want what is best for us.
However, because we are humans
and we don’t have the power to control everything that life presents to us,
some things don’t go as we plan and hope for, regardless of how much we try to
make the best out of our lives.
Sometimes when life does not turn
out to be what we expected, we feel defeated, feel like failures, we become
sad, heartbroken, depressed, we cry, curse and some commit suicide because we
feel totally drained. All hopes are shattered as there seem to be no way out
from whatever situation we are in. It is during these times that we need
someone to hold out hands because we will be too weak to stand by ourselves, a
time when we need to be told that it is possible to pick up ourselves up and
start moving even if it means crawling but surely one day we shall be walking
and eventually run again.
Pull her down!
We are humans, we come from
different backgrounds, we have different beliefs and so we respond to difficult
situations differently. Some of us are self-motivated so much that when we fall
we can pick ourselves up without crying out for help or we are privileged to
have people who are always there to protect us, to catch us before we hit the
ground so that we don’t feel the pain of falling and spare us the embarrassment
too.
But then again, there are some of
us who have no one to lean on and we tend to cry out for help through certain
behaviours which our societies are quick to judge. The same society that is
corrupt, too judgemental, too selective of who to help out, too keen to please
those we consider to be in our circles or at least “worthy” to be.
Needless to say our society is envious, which has to a pull him/her down
syndrome.
Negativity and effects on esteem
The world is full of negative
things that we should protect each other from as society. Love, unity,
contention and care bring peace amongst us because they are richer than the
happiness that we think money can give us. There is abuse, hunger, sexual
exploitation, poor health, peer pressure, poverty, depression, death; it never
rains but pours for us and we only let ourselves cry out loud and express our
pain and fears.
Unfortunately, the society we try
to seek help from is quick to point fingers, call us names, to create memes and
find something to laugh about, to be sarcastic about. Have we ever thought that
maybe “kapfambi” is a victim of child sexual abuse and she needs our
help as society. An egg is fragile with its thin shell locking its precious
contents inside, but as we boil it becomes stronger and even hard to break.
Let us be transformed by the
renewal of our minds and seek to help heal our societies.
Be the candle that burns for others
Everyone of us has a space that
we can fill so let us be kind and generous as we remember that lighting
someone’s candle does not switch off your own light.
Edith Wharton says there are two
ways we can spread light; either by being the candle or the mirror that
reflects it. We all need someone to be there for us in life so we all should
learn to accept each other’s faults and choose to celebrate our differences to
create a healthy environment for everyone to live in within our societies.
Let us not judge anyone because
we never know what they have been going through in their lives and what they
keep up with just to see each day pass through. Let us not normalise what is
not right. Sometimes we do not realise the impact that our negative comments
and how they degrade a person’s self-esteem and more. Let us be helpers, let us
change the world for the better as we remember that doing good will definitely
make us feel good too.
Cathrine ‘Melanin Black Queen’ Mashavira is a runway and editorial
model and a finalist contestant for Miss Zimbabwe Grand 2020. She is also
Development Studies graduate with the Midlands State University (MSU).Email: ki******@gm***.com
The views expressed here are her own.
