MP Musikavanhu launches silly season

Whoever coined the term ‘silly season’ referring to elections season knew what he or she was talking about. Zvokwadi nhaka tinoonerera worse with the advent of social media where these digitally impaired politicians will be sharing their content manipulating the masses, huye bodo.
Anyway, let me digress a bit; they say half a loaf is better than nothing ladies and gentlemen. I am a bit happy that Minister Mhona heeded to my advice though he went only halfway with it. Suspending Rimbi Tours and Zebra Kiss operating licenses was ill advised but allowing Manjenjenje Zebra Kiss back on the road is a step towards the right direction Minister, chingopedzisai vadzoke vese paroad. Just think of the families suffering because of that. I won’t be tempted to talk more about this Hon Minister, I don’t have enough time and I think what I said last week was enough for you.
MaZimbo futi—I think we have suffered so much to an extent where we cringe when serious issues are topical; we would rather spend time discussing Mai Denzy naBaba Denzy than zvenyika zvirikudai kutidana kuti tindonyoresa kuvhota tigovhota zvakare. Ndakamboti paya Chamisa udza vanhu vako kuti sunga one sunga dozen, munhu nemhuri yake kumashure, like Dougie said kuti uchidhiraivha bango rako kkkkk, zvatinombooneswa mupolitics so, seka hako Mapombi. Hanzi chihure was sweet until us women joined the game and now it’s uncontrollable like veld fire. Fellow women, ndinzwei nekunzwisisa, let’s not put shame on our gender samai Denzel the lady of the moment kkk.
Back to the issue at hand, I used to admire Farai Musikavanhu, this son to the late Joseph Msika who Mugabe changed his surname so that he appears to be from Matebelaland so that he could breach the unity accord kkk. Yes he was Joseph Msikavanhu and was Shona not Ndebele. Yes his son Farai was doing well all along but is now behaving like the biblical Galatians who started from the spirit and ended in flesh instead of vice versa. He was good and he did a lot for his constituency but zvekuzopawo vana mapen and then in a bid to salvage the embarrassing donation goes on to write paragraphs about youth empowerment kudii ikoko? As if the idea of such a donation was not enough he went on to pose for pictures handing over pens, really? Nhai honourable, what’s honourable about donating ball point pens dzoga kutozoisa exact number?Hee?
I heard CCC urging party members to recruit new voters from schools but I don’t think they will get them especially in Chiredzi.Who in this era and age poses for a picture to get ball point pens iwo angova ma$1 for 5 or for 6 aya, nxaa Musikavanhu tikwanire iwe, stop abusing our kids and teachers for votes, we need meaningful development not that nonsense. Chete that’s where we allowed ourselves to be as a nation. To be reduced to beggars who clap and ululate for a pen. Isu tichakura taipiwa nemateacher isu. Vaitoatenga nemari yavo vachitipa. Just pay teachers and you will see them buying our kids some pens not using CDF to buy pens while roads have potholes anenge madish. Chete an area gets a leader it deserves kkkk, kuseka nhamo serugare.
Imiwo vanhu veChiredzi hindaa makapusa, last time you even failed to field one candidate kuChiredzi North to stand against Bhila and with his level of stupidity hakuna kwatoenda.
Ko is vakuru back from summit? Ndakaona kuairport vakaumbirira kuzogamuchira zvakabve Senegal where I’m told he bragged that the country is food secure. Hanzi he said rimwe gorosi tichatopa shiri kwedu Zimbabwe, that time when NGOs who work in that area said pajekerere that a lot of people in the country are food insecure. Kuno kuchitima ndoswerera mabanana akaora nemaputi while my leader is gallivanting telling all and sundry that ndakaguta, Mwari ave nemi. Truly we are in silly season. Vamwe vakazomboti we are going to export raw water to South Africa, and people ululated: Two whole ministers, vanotogara mucabinet chaimo. Ndosaka muchipatisiwa, chinouchirisa chii ipapo? But I am sure Kedha enjoyed the reigns kubva last month when mukuru was kuleave, I thought Kedha will do what he did in November wegore riya. He just has to redo zviya so that we celebrate tichiziva unlike what we did in 2017. If Kedha is failing then PV can do it, he knows how it’s done and he was there pazvakaitwa. It’s wishful thinking zvayo because I’m told they are related kuhwanamai hwavo hameno ikoko.
Let me tell you ladies and gentlemen, election season kudai we will see a lot. Ipapa that’s when you see kuti tirikutambudzika mvura yekupomba magetsi in Kariba iyo yakazara mumisoro yevanhu vari kuParliament uko. Some of these MPs haa kutambisa vote indeed. I saw another one forcing a woman to thank him on camera because he had donated some covers emabook. Hanzi Honorable Chinosengwa, chinosengwa chichiindepi with all that density in his mind? Ama2k call it being dense or being thick, if not obtuse. No wonder we are having these serious power cuts, strategy zero kumusoro uko. Hanzi open for business, murima imomo? What business when you have reduced cities to growth points? Seka hako Mapombi. Opposition on the other hand always busy pointing out zvirikukonekwa neZanu. Imi, imi, imi, tikwanirei mazvinzwa. Who doesn’t know that ZANU has failed? What’s new about Zanu’s incompetence? Give us solutions and what your alternative policies are so that we compare and see what will work for us not kungoti takarasima neZanu. Zvamakangofundawo wani, and some of you even have experience being in government. We want solutions isu, not zvekuswerotukirira Zanu,saka masiyanei? But then again haa ndozvimwe gudo nemunhu. You’re being manipulated pamaelectoral boundaries chaipo and muchikaviswa risina mweya. Kutambiswa front neZanu and you’re beaten on technicalities. Zanu chiororo kkkkk that time when you’re at the forefront frothing on the mouth denouncing delimitation report that may actually help you. Ini zvangu ini. And Priscilla haasi kutomboda zvese izvozvo, she clearly said handiti you know henyu that the buck stops with ZEC when it comes to delimitation? Zvirimo muconstitution imi bwaibwai.
Anyway let me go ndindokanga maputi angu for lunch. Mazuvano madrama haaperi maelections akuuya aya. Manje neniwo I registered to vote, kana mocampaigner mundipewo matshirts nemacap. But you should know that in my life I have made some very bad decisions asi one thing I will never do in this lifetime is to vote for this other party, izvozvo handiiti nyangwe zvodii kkkk. Continue being silly zvenyu takamirira final delimitation report mozoti mopinda muground, tichaonerera. Togarepi akaita chair Ad Hoc Committee akagadzirisa zvekwakwe kuGutu South vamwe makangoti vavava. One last thing, musiyane nepolitical violence zvamurimi, tokuzivai. Respect the sanctity of life, ndatenda hangu.