Hello ladies and gentlemen, I am sure you are all getting over the hangover yemaelections. Let’s go back to our normal hustles. I have seen kuno kuChitima market formally known as Dr Giresi Mugabe trading centre, madomasi haupedzi zvekuti my teeth are always gnashing. Kutogara wakavhara muromo, ungachenama here nehwadzira kkk. I heard Dr Stop It came to the Inaguresheni dressed to kill, kutosvotesa Mai Matwins. Hanzi the first daughters-inlaw ndovakambozama but they couldn’t match Gucci Gire. I am sure Trabablas will give her the honor of renaming our Market again in her name, ko yakabviswaka Chiremera. Yes, it won’t be surprising, I don’t know where this guy got that system. When I was doing Geography, we were taught about recycling. However, it was mainly recycling metals and plastics. I have never heard of recycling people like what is happening. Recycling people kunge maplastic sure. I always ask myself why resources were wasted going for polls only to remain where we were.
We thought we were getting over the surprise win of the ruling party and thought we would get some consolation in the appointments then boom, Campbell Dugish wemadhirezi fame has taken oath as the country’s vice president kkk. Come on guys, the guy resigned and all this while he was contemplating what he did then an 80 year old President who got in through a coup for the first time, couped second time then got in through a Frawed erekshen in the Jenarari’s voice kkk. Nhaiwe Scarfmore, let Campbell rest, can’t you see he is frail? But isvowo Kembo mukati maguchu asvaimwa haasiwo anoita svisafa? That guy has been ill for too long and I wish for him to rest kunotamba nevazukuru kumba kana variko. Reappointment of Chiwenga was obvious but pana Dugish haa bodo. Haasiye ega, Mudenda and the late Border Green Bomber Gezi’s widow Tsitsi are back again. Hanzi they sailed through uncontested after CCC members got in late for the election, imi woye. Iwo maGreen Bomber akamboendepiko, they were clipped wings by FAZ kkk. KuSenate have learnt Marble Chinomona retained the position again. Ko hakuna vamwe here nhai. I just want to thank one of us Madam Maggie Chakabuda for trying her luck though she lost as deputy president.
I know ndikataura you will say Mapombi atanga but let me tell you the honest truth, there won’t be any changes in the cabinet. We will simply continue. So holding elections is just a formality which wastes time, money and drain hope in people. I think we should just do away with them and find another way of doing things until we are ready for elections.
It was all smiles at Mt Hampden kkk, I saw a picture of Fadzi, Ostallos, Hwende around of course Madam Thoko, yeah people were happy with the outcome of this erection mirai ndikutaurirei. But ladies and gentlemen, let’s pray for Madam Thoko, she is not well and only our prayers can save her. I am grateful to the young man Chamisa for his heart, allowing her back to parliament though iye she failed to get to State House. I am sure we will all be able to bury our hatchets like what Chamisa and Madam Thoko did. I am not sure hangu who had wronged who but ndakambonzwa kuti Madam vaida kupisirwa mumba kuBuhera uko. However, let bygones be bygones and let’s unite as Zimbabweans and build our country. But Zanu ngaisadaro vakomana, so can someone balance me here, in 2028 what will be the slogan for CCC, NHM inenge ichaita? Maybe inenge yatova NHM again kkk, Ngaapinde Hake Mudara, he will be old ladies and gentlemen, he will be close to retirement zvekuti pakashaya zvinoitika apa mmmm.
But I can’t imagine a parliament without Biti and Bhuru, Themba Mliswa. Hanzi Mliswa was castrated by a small boy and retreated to cabbage farming. Mukamuonawo please tell him to bring some here kuchitima, I want to taste cabbage from Notorn rine mufudze weBhuru. Biti and Mliswa were the only two guys who could call a spade a spade in parliament. Chete we were born to believe that Biti will always be in parliament. Next term we have to do away with the likes of Hwende nana Chibaya, sure they are representing the alternative and cannot be seen being MPs for life kunge kuZanu where the likes of Oppah have never known any other life out of parliament since 1980. I admire her bravery as a woman but pakuzogarisa apa mmm, no.
I heard vamwe venyu especially those from MDC yaDhagi saying hee why did CCC MPs went for swearing in, they were supposed to boycott, imi? Muzvibate, these guys were fighting in trenches for exactly that. Moda kuti varamwire gudo munda? It will work, no, it will not work, you will not work, simple. Why did the MDC candidates contest in a flawed process when they knew that Togarasei had withdrawn from the race? Musada kutinzwa handiti. Tine bp dzekutongwa nevene moda kutinyaudza imi vanaBaba Bertha.
This past week yainakidza kani nadzo naguresheni countrywide. That’s where you see kuti takapemberera ngozi tichiti mudzimu. Mapombi can bet kuti the majority who got in especially local authorities hapana chinozikanwa. Kungofarira kunoba iwo mastand. Manje hapana chisingaperi. Ask Roki Kamuzonda. Wakangoravira two minutes ndobva zvadhakwa, Shanty ndokutiza nechinhu kkkk. I saw him at the swearing in pacouncil on Friday, unongoona kuti kuseka hako but the guy has chest pains. I think we should all pray for Roki guys. Nhamo neman’a hazvisiyani veduwe. I also saw Maboke at the swearing in ceremony. Manje dziya musatombodzityira manje. Zvadzo zvitori bhoo ipo paya. Ask Chamisa and Kurauone the type of guy Maboke is, they know kkkk. Tichingoti zvakare congratulations Mureri, munotiitira zvinhu kwazvo kuParliament uko musanosvodesa Advovo tokutembai. This time the August House is full of young blood. We expect policy making to take a turn for the better, not kungoimba sezvana zve primary zvirikubva kumasports muchisvotesana. Mapombi was disappointed seeing whole MPs breaking into party songs kuParliament. You guys expose us to ridicule by the world imimi. We will never beat the allegations nababa vangu kudai. Motisekesa imi and mosvodesa, nxaa. Chii icho chiya? Mese zvenyu nemi mazijembere ekuZanu kutojoinirawo, kwanai imi, you were elected by the people for the people.
I saw Perekedzera Mboko kunaguresheni hugging ED dzichifara chaizvo. Let me tell you guys, politics hamuna zera nadzo idzi. Ndambotaura ndikati recycling irikuitwa iyi zviri zvega izvozvi? What is ED up to? What’s going on KunaChancellor Avenue in the dead of night? Varumeka. Suddenly we have an influx of returnees being seen in odd places. Yes, inauguration yaED is an odd place for vese vanaGire nevana vake, Mboko, even Chombo being acquitted. Vanhu ava were sworn enemies not long ago, now they are all mushy mushy around each other. Jenarari muri safe here uko? Kembo ava nemaIncidents akati oo achiti ndiye next president wenyika ino. Plus that prophecy yegore riya kwaBushiri. Jenarari ka, heya! Regai zvakadero zvikazhane, Mapombi anenge achingoona hake to give commentary and analysis nekujekesa pasina kujeka. I’m a vagabond zvangu but ndoonera. Anyway, ladies and gentlemen, we are back to square zero. Loadshedding is playing nyemu nyemu with us lately. Kwatiri kubva ndokwatananga manje ipapa. Regai tione macouncils that are now with CCC people with no power nor resources kuti kunobudei, kkkkk. Team racho rogona richitovawo nezhara dzaro riya. Huye bodo. Ndozvamakada macitizens. All the same, Zanu yakanzwa bhata.
Let me go ndindokanga hangu maputi angu for lunch, ndozorova mabanana akaora time time, but before I go, pane ati afonera Baba here kuti magetsi ava kuenda, I remember he said kana aenda mundifonere kkkkk Mboko imboko!
