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So our late Mbudzi wrote ‘O’ Level for Chiwenga?

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Kkkkkkk Zimbabwe and its leadership!
Mapombi heard munyika maita umwe anenge mupengo unonzi Nkosana Moyo who thinks he can come from self-exile and become President of this country. President Mugabe once said kana wafemerwa nemukadzi kumba worota watonga nyika ino – zviroto zviroto!
And this Nkosana guy is really a joke; honestly after running away in 2001 and spending close to two decades in the diaspora tichisvuurwa nenhamo yaMugabe toga muno, he suddenly pops up hanzi ndava kuda kuita President kkkkkkkk nhamo.
Zimbabwe is not Mberengwa Cde! He neglected chin hygiene long time ago and it’s really difficult to trust such a person to run the whole country when he cannot even take care of his chin. Mapombi laughed lungs out when she saw some pictures of Nkosana moving around the streets eating sugarcane and boarding kombis kkkkkkkk bambo vangu makainonokera colgate.
Mapombi’s advice to Nkosana is very simple; do not follow people Cde but let people follow you.  Kana iri nzara why can’t Nkosana join Mnangagwa camp and stop bringing confusion among opposition parties.
But Mapombi is happy Morgan Tsvangirai summed it up recently when he signed something with the leader of Transform Zimbabwe, Jacob Ngarivhume. Hanzi rwizi runozara nemadiriro so it is all these tributaries which would eventually feed into Save, the biggest river in the country.  Musazoti hamuna kuzvinzwa vana Joice Mujuru, Egypty Dzinemunhenzva, Tendai Biti, Welshman Ncube and Simba Makoni nevamwewo vasati vava kuzikanwa sana Nkosana Moyo.
But Mapombi has realised one thing about Zanu PF and MDC-T of late. Have you ever noticed that these two political parties no longer use recent pictures of their leaders? Zanu yava kushandisa picture yaMugabe yekuma 1980 while MDC-T uses Tsvangirai’s picture yekuma2008. Mapombi guesses the reasons are obvious – kuchembera nekurwara!
But why afraid to use current pictures if that is the person you believe in? Why not use Mugabe iyeye wachembera or Tsvangirai ari kurwara iyeye kana ari iye wamuri kuda? After all who doesn’t know that Mugabe wachembera? Or that Tsvangirai is not feeling well?  Please do not use yester year pictures tipeiwo cuurent pictures so that we know how our leaders look like at the moment.
Anyway, can someone who really know this Pyschology Maziwisa guy tell me kuti dzakanyatso kuti kwesere here or dzakangotambawo nevana sedzana Mapombi?  Mapombi thinks this Maziwisa guy is overrated – the truth is that he is a dunderhead. Bharanzi zvaro.
How can he say all old people must be assisted to vote? Kutsvaga kuda kubiririra masikati machena – who says old people cannot vote at their own?
Mapombi begins to think that Maziwisa akataura dimikira; he was actually referring to his party president Mugabe that he no longer thinks properly therefore he must be assisted to vote come 2018. Ndomafungirewo avo vaPyschology zvisinei chiringazuva chedu chabva chatsvuka chikakwata saka nyaya yavo ngatimboisiira pano tozoibata muchikamu chinotevera.
Mapombi was so excited by the news she got few days ago. Mapombi heard zvakazonyandurana manje gonzo nachin’ai and things are not so well between Professor Jonathan Moyo and Army Commander Constantino Chiwenga. I heard masecrets ese ava kubuda manje.
Mapombi heard kuti our late Retired Colonel Kudzai Mbudzi is the one who wrote ‘O’ Level examinations for Chiwenga kkkkkkkkkkk. We all know Mbudzi was damn intelligent – that might be very possible. Mapombi heard again that even the doctorate (PhD) our good commander vakaitirwa futi kkkkkkk gore rino. Handei tione!
Gariswa madhara aya kungonyepera kuchenjera nyambiswa hapana chinozivikanwa. Gore riya we heard that our former RBZ governor Gideon Gono vaiitirwa PhD yavo naDr Munyaradzi Kereke. Now we are hearing that the army commander vakatonyorerwa even ‘O’ Level chaiyo kkkkkkkk.
Politics is a dirty game kana madzida motoshinga because chokwadi chese chinobuda pachena. Anyway, we are waiting to hear who did Dr Chiwenga’s PhD for him. As long as we have internet connection our good Professor Moyo will soon tweet. Tichaonerera nhaka.
At least we now know kuti madhara aya hapana zvinozivikanwa kungwarira paguyo sehuku. They use power to get anything – from beautiful women, wealthy to academic qualifications.
It’s almost lunch time guys let me go ndindozvikangira hangu maputi angu for lunch but will pass through nekuTanaiwa market looking for rotten bananas. But last week ndakamboiitei yoghurt from Gushungo dairy. Wish if we can have another youth interface rally again here in Masvingo ndimboipamha zvakare yoghurt. Mapombi now knows why varume vachirambira pazvigaro ava vari kudya tunonaka – didn’t you see them eating Lays that day? Isu vana Mapombi tichingokuvara nawo maputi.
By the way, Mphoko is too quiet these days – Mapombi is very sure that he is brewing something. Very soon he will crack another shocker – don’t forget he is the same guy who spent close to two years living in a five star hotel ka uyu. Mphoko imboko!mapombi

Charles Austin’s Theatre gears up for Doug Hill Schools Drama Festival

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Learnmore Masomere

The Charles Austin Theatre will be hosting a schools drama festival on August 1-2 in honour of Doug Hill’s 70 years of unwavering servitude to the development of theatre arts in Masvingo and the whole country.
A fundraising dinner, scheduled for Friday July 14, has been organised for the purpose of bringing together potential sponsors for the event which is expected to accommodate at least 200 school children.
Preparations for the fundraiser are well-under way and invitations to schools have already been systematically distributed, with Masvingo’s corporate heavyweights and friends of the Charles Austin Theatre having been encouraged to support the cause.
Proceeds from the event will go towards the Doug Hill Schools Drama Festival which is marked to be one of the best festivals in Masvingo this year.
The festival is named after the theatre guru himself and is aimed at attracting drama performances from most, if not all, primary and high schools in the province.
The Charles Austin Theatre itself was built out of the efforts of many different passionate individuals and it is hoped that the same tradition can be continued.
At the fundraising dinner, tables will be pegged at US$100 for 6 people, US$50 for couples and US$20 for individuals and a three-course meal will be served.
A documentary on the life and work of Doug Hill will be screened and there will be theatre and music performances.
Those who want to attend the festival can visit the Charles Austin Theatre or the Facebook group: Friends of The Charles Austin Theatre for further details.entertainment

Mutare cop jailed for indecent assault

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Nashe Mahachi

MUTARE – A member of the Zimbabwe Republic Police (ZRP) based in Odzi has been slapped with a five-year-jail term for fondling breasts and privates parts of a married woman who had sought for his assistance in connection with her abusive hubby.
Tonderai Chipani (38) of ZRP Odzi was convicted of indecent assault by magistrate Lazarus Murendo. One year of his five-year jail sentence was suspended on condition of good behavior.
Appearing for the State, Brighton Shamuyarira told the court that on April 22 at around 14:00 hrs, the woman approached Chipani seeking his assistance in having her husband arrested for abusing her.
“She again returned at around 20:00 hrs seeking his assistance. Chipani then accompanied her back to her house.
“On their way, Chipani asked her how she was going to pay him for arresting her husband. After some distance, he asked for sexual favours. He went on to grab the woman, forcibly put his hands in her pants and fondled her breasts. He stopped when the woman screamed for help. She reported the matter she led to the arrest of Chipani.local

Handcrafters conduct 9th conference in Bulawayo

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Shumirai Zhou

ZVISHAVANE – A total of 27 African countries that are members of the Coordinating Committee for Development and Promotion of African Handicraft (Codepa) held their 9th conference at the Zimbabwe International Trade Fair (ZITF) grounds in Bulawayo.
The conference ran under the theme ‘The national, subnational and continental policies for development and promotion of handicrafts in Codepa member states: appraisal and perspective’.
Codepa started in 1988 in Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso and its objective is to establish a permanent and close co-operation between the African member countries, to conduct reflections and take actions aimed at improving the craftsmen’s daily life and guaranteeing a better future to African craftsmen.
Weavers, fashion designers, carpenters, wood carvers panel beaters among other handcrafters were part of the conference exhibiting their products.
The conference facilitates interaction between artistes and their ministers so as to promote handcraft as small to medium enterprise.
Each country had a representative who presented on lived experiences, with challenges highlighted being mainly about the welfare of handcrafters and lack of necessary support.
Codepa chairperson Saluman diara Suba, who is a Cote d’Ivoire national, stated that despite existing challenges in the sector, the future was bright.
“The problem we have is of mobilising resources. However, the African Bank assured to give support to handcrafters in African countries. Also as member countries of Codepa, you should be committed in paying affiliate fees to the organisation,” said diara Suba.
Small and Medium Enterprises Minister in Zimbabwe, Sithembiso Nyoni urged handcrafters to unite and form cooperatives so as to come up with quality and best products.
Codepa member countries are Benin, Burkina Faso, Burundi, Cameroon, Congo, Cote d’lvoire, Gabon, Ghana, Guinea Bissau, Mali, Madagascar, Mauritania, Niger, Central Africa, DRC, Chad, Togo and Zimbabwe.
Observers of the conference were from Egypt, Gambia, Sudan, Zambia and Nigeria.local

Business expo livens Zvishavane

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Prof Vhiriri making a speech at the Zvish expo

Shumirai Zhou

ZVISHAVANE – Zvishavane entrepreneurs in different business sectors recently exhibited their products and gave knowledge to the public on the use and prices of their goods and services.
This was during the official launch of the 2017 business expo in the city along Zvishavane-Masvingo road.
Entrepreneurs from the many sectors including construction and engineering, insurance, retail and wholesale, services and authorities, uniformed service (ZRP), mining, public services and transport attended the event.
Director for Midlands State University (MSU) Zvishavane campus Professor Advice Vhiriri, who was the guest of honour, encouraged entrepreneurs in Zvishavane to continue working hard to attain the goals set by the ZimAsset economic blueprint.
He also urged council should provide suitable land or showground exhibition centre as a way of putting the town on the map in the same manner that the Gweru Agricultural Show is held.
“Zvishavane is one of the fastest growing town in Zimbabwe. Events such as these will help the business sector and community to meet and share ideas thereby creating long lasting relationships.
“I want to challenge the Zvishavane Town Council to create a conducive environment for these entrepreneurs gathered here so that they can achieve their goals…. This business expo can put Zvishavane on the map and attract more investors into the town,” said Prof Vhiriri.
The show ended with some entrepreneurs being awarded certificates for having performed well in different categories of the business sector.local

Mwenezi RDC holds interview for CEO post

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Cephas Shava

MWENEZI – The Mwenezi Rural District Council (RDC) has interviewed six candidates shortlisted for the position of Chief Executive Officer (CEO).
District Administrator (DA) Rosemary Chingwe confirmed the development but could not say when the new CEO will be announced.
“The interviews were conducted and a special full council meeting that convened last week resolved that it will accept the results as per their outcome and no any alterations will be made.
“As for the announcement of the results, I am not sure about the exact dates because the results have to undergo a number of procedures; from the Provincial Administrator (PA) up to the highest level,” said Chingwe.
Preliminary results are however expected to be announced any time from now with the approval of Rural Development minister Abednigo Ncube.
The candidates were grilled by council CEOs from various parts of the country as well as by officials from the DA and PA’s offices among others.
The Mwenezi RDC CEO post became vacant when the then CEO, Stanslas Mavesere retired in February this year.local

Chiredzi ward 2 by-election

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…Zanu PF’s Ngwenya blames factionalism for woes

Beatific Gumbwanda

CHIREDZI – Zanu PF candidate for the upcoming ward 2 by-election, Obert Ngwenya has blamed internal intra-party strife for what he calls is a concerted smear campaign against him.
A few weeks ago, Ngwenya was assaulted by a man who accused him of dating his wife, a police officer, but Ngwenya dismissed the allegations as the work of his adversaries who wanted him to lose the police vote.
Recently, fliers with his rival Gabriel Chebundo’s image circulated in the ward and on social media, directly attacking Ngwenya’s personality. Chebundo is contesting in the by-election as an independent candidate.
One of the messages on the posters read, “He is a pollutant of community, so Ngwenya anofanira kunokandwa kumarara, sewage is better than him because anotora vakadzi vevanhu.”
Chebundo, however, said he distanced himself from the fliers during a recent closed door meeting with Zimbabwe Electoral Commission (Zec) officials and the police.
“I was recently called by Zec to answer questions about the fliers that are being associated with me. My election motto is not yet out and I am not the one who made those fliers that are circulating,” said Chebundo.
Ngwenya now blames some senior party officials whom he said were not pleased with his victory in the primary elections.
“This is internal politics. I don’t have any problems with Chebundo because I am quite sure that I will win this election in spite of the challenges. This is being done by some senior officials in my party who want me to pay tribute to them before I occupy this public office,” said Ngwenya.
During the controversial party primaries to select the candidate, leaders were reportedly divided, with the provincial commissariat led by Jevas Masosota routing for Ngwenaya against Ruben Madzingo whom the generality of the people is said to have preferred.
The by-election will be held on August 5 to replace Jesta Mateyaunga who died after a short illeness in May.politics

Council engages Kasukuwere over Chikanga squatters

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Saviour Kasukuwere


Lloyd Shunje

MUTARE – City of Mutare Town Clerk Joshua Maligwa and Mayor Tatenda Nhamarare will soon meet the Minister of Local Government Public Works and National Housing, Saviour Kasukuwere over squatters who have invaded Chikanga.
Speaking to Tellzim News, Nhamarare said the council was very worried about the 700 families who were living as squatters near the railway line in Chikanga.
“Last week, council resolved that the Town Clerk and I will meet the minister on the issue of squatters who have invaded Chikanga and we have so far booked an appointment for this week with the minister so he can assist us,” said Nhamarare.
The city has also sought an eviction order through the High Court but the matter is set to be heard during the first week of August.
“We have also approached the High Court for an eviction orders and the issue will be heard during the first week of August,” added Nhamarare.
During last week’s full council meeting, some councillors said the council had no resources to evict the squatters.
They said council did not have the land on which to move them to, highlighting that it was only the local government ministry which could help.
Mutare is one of the cities hardest hit by the problem of people who allocate themselves land outside of government parametres thereby putting a strain on resources and posing a danger on public health.local

Cash-strapped Chiredzi RDC begs ratepayers to pay

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Beatific Gumbwanda

CHIREDZI – Chiredzi Rural District Council chairperson Alderman Matsilele has pleaded with ratepayers to pay up their dues, saying the local authority was in a financial fix caused by little revenue inflows.
Presenting his second quarter report in a recent full council meeting, Matsilele said it was now exceptionally difficult to fund recurrent expenditure because people were not paying.
“This year the challenges have begun quite early; in June, which spells a lot of trouble ahead. This was due to late payment by our major stakeholders who normally pay at the beginning of the year.
“Council is supposed to collect about $271 000 every month, but during the month under review, only $77 900 was collected, which is far short of our monthly requirement,” he said.
Matsilele also highlighted that in the month of June, labour costs outweighed what was budgeted for due to staff retrenchments.
“During the period under review, employment costs exceeded what was budgeted for due to the statutory obligations for the retrenched staff,” said Matsilele.
He indicated that this year’s annual performance (January to June) was far much lower than that of previous years.
“As of 30 June 2017, council had collected $994 911 21, which is an annual performance of 30.59 percent. However, the performance for the period from January to June is 61.7 percent from an anticipated budget income of $1 626 349 for the period,” said Matsilele.local

Teachers’ union pledges to support Zanu PF in 2018

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Chiredzi West MP Darlington Chiwa

Beatific Gumbwanda

CHIREDZI – The Teachers Union of Zimbabwe (TUZ) has promised Zanu PF its full support ahead of the much-anticipated general election next year, urging its members to do whatever it takes to ensure the ruling party retains power.
This was heard last week at Chiredzi Primary School during the conclusion of an ICT training workshop organised by the union for some 88 of its members in Chiredzi West.
The training was the 13th of a series of workshops being held nationwide ostensibly to help TUZ members understand the Biometric Voter Registration System (BVR) and prepare them for the elections.
TUZ president Timon Tandi said teachers were opinion leaders in their communities and therefore had a duty to campaign for Zanu PF.
He said teachers should spread the message to kids who will then influence their parents to back Zanu PF in 2018.
“We are for Zanu PF and it is your role as teachers to back Zanu PF wherever you are as it is the party which brought education to your doorstep. Pamberi nekuvhotera Zanu, pasi nekutengesa nyika!
“We are doing these courses in all constituencies in order to bring together teachers and their local MPs because a teacher who teaches a class of 40 pupils in class can influence many parents….we will lose votes in 2018 if we fail to do so,” said Tandi.
Chiredzi West MP Darlington Chiwa, who was the guest speaker at the graduation, made it clear that teachers were being used to help sway the new voter registration system to the favour of Zanu PF.
 “We are training you such that you will have the knowledge to win elections for the ruling party in 2018 using the new system of voting,” said Chiwa, warning the teachers not to ‘sell out’ as they did in 2008.local