Wednesday, September 22, 2021
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Hello graduates, welcome to ‘Vendor-land’

Welcome to the world of vendors – ndoinonzi Vendorsland yamauya ino where you are going to survive with nothing but vending. Kkkk kutotengesa mabanana akaora chaiko kunana Mapombi Adonha.

But please help me to salute my two heroes from University of Zimbabwe vakomana makapenga!
I mean the recently graduated vendors from UZ. Ko iyo UZ yavakumboita seiko mazuvano. It has become a culture that there should be some kind of drama when there is a graduation at UZ, the drama ranges from people who are just called from the crowd to get a PhD and the following day vatova kunzi Dr Amai hehehee-e huriii!. Izvi ndizvo zvichatadzisa vakawanda kuita ma PhD iwayo atinongohwa nembiri. Kkkkk what if we also ask for our degrees, I deserve an honorary degree about the life that I have spent at the Dr Grace Mugabe Trading Centre. I must be called Dr Mapombi Adonha who specializes on eating rotten bananas and all those dirty things. Okay munhu wese achanzi doctor kana achingoda …asi hamunyari here machinda imwi, kuti mapedza kugoverana minda zvikaramba motanga kugoverana maPhD…kkkkk harisiro rinofunga…you will remain as stupid as before. Aah nhaka zvangu, sometimes kutaurisa hakusi bho because ndingamudzingwa muno maDr Amai mandinodyira mabanana angu akaora.
Now back to the two brave graduates who were able to protest at UZ graduation. Hear me graduates, life is tough here. I tried to do vending soon after my arrival in town but look where I am living now. I am therefore not scaring or threatening anyone but to be honest with you guys, munhu wese achatouya kuno chete. I do not have a computer and I don’t know how that twitter works but I hear the Minister of Stem said something very nasty about the two vendors who graduated at UZ recently. If what I heard was true, then the Minister should be examined – I mean how can the whole professor could stoop that low to the extent of tweeting that the degrees can be withdrawn because the two guys protested nenyaya yemabasa. It is a shame that the party which said it was going to unlock 2,2 million jobs is now telling its finest graduates that they should create own jobs. Kkkk ha guys sometimes kunyarawo so must be the right thing to do than trying to clarify, blaming everyone for your failure. Just recently you were saying tokupai mabasa, today you tell graduates to create own jobs. Iye minister of Stem kana kunyara wena, tweeting such rubbish nxaa I don’t like it.
Don’t blame anyone for failing to create jobs. You started your ZimAsset and nothing happened takangotarisa. Now that ZimAsset failed and with command Agriculture promising to be another failure and dubious ministers occupying high offices – the President can be forgiven for reading the same speech on several times.
But vafana you have graduated at a very wrong time …graduating when the government is introducing bond paper as money. It is the same time again when Zanu PF is just thinking about nothing besides kurova ma vendors and yet there is no option for you besides becoming vendors and try surviving through that. What can we do when the government says pataiti 2,2 million jobs taireva mavendors. This must be crazy.
So all the graduates are adding to the numbers of vendors already in the streets. What irks Mapombi is the hypocrisy from the government when they pretend as if they are not even involved – they are busy looking for money for the conference to be held here in December at the show grounds. This time it’s nearer so Mapombi can just walk there, who knows maybe ndogona kutoperekedzwa nemagraduates. Anything can happen in this vendorland.
 But nyika ino mauraya moga guys. Don’t you see that airtime vending is the only job opportunity for the new graduates!
Isu vanaMapombi Regai zvedu tizvinyararire! Regai ndikange maputi angu for lunch.

Mboko imboko!!

TellZim News is the leading news organization in the Southern region. It provides candid, balanced and timely news from the communities. Keeping it real. Committed to tell Zimbabwe.

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