Mapombi’s 2024 Easter’s Prayer

Ladies and gentlemen, Masvingo seems to have already jumped into winter earlier than other provinces, haa parikufuridza especially at night paChitima apo. As you know, Mapombi has a big heart, so she certainly feels for others who live in the streets like her. Ehe, nesuwo mavagabond we have good hearts because we know the importance of having one. Life chaiyo can be changed by just one act of kindness, rombe rakaita seni rikatosimudzwawo muguruva rikaswera rakudya patafura naMambo kana kutodraivha Aqua sevamwe. Ahh, ko zvandanga ndotoparidzazve nhai, dai pangoita angoti go deeper dai ndatodzika dzika nayo ndima. Handizorina hangu power to come up with vana Aguma but ndinombozamazama. The Easter holidays are making me think about prayer a lot, and like many others who are going to find their ways to church conferences, neniwo ndinawovo munamato kuna Nyadenga. Mapombi haana secret, so even when she prays, zvese zvinenge zvingori pajekerere, ko handiite sehurumende yenyuka iyi yekuti dai makomborero ainzi anoallocatwa negovernment like many other things kutanga kwegore rega rega, taisaluma kana tai. Taizongomaona azara mublack market apa asingasvikiriki like magold coins or iyo bitcoin yatinongonzwa nemaNigerian.
Before I start running my mouth zvandajaira, let us close our eyes and pray—eeeh apo, nemiwo vatadzi vanobira varombo tsinzinyai uko tinamate. I know some of you won’t close your eyes but anyway, Mwari ndewemunhu wese, chero nematax collector anobira vanhu anongovadawo vanaMthuli nanaMangundya, ahh sorry gara haasisiko. Angava hake asisiko but we feel him in spirit, kkkkk, or should I say mumaMbuya Nehanda iwo mazibond notes adai kupera sehondo yemuseve. Veduwe nditisureiwo, ndamboti let’s close our eyes tinamate pava nechinguva. Ndisati ndavarairwa futi, God, I want to thank you for the wisdom that you gave me to discern what is right from wrong, and for seeing foolishness from afar, like how all our artists are begging for cars from Wicknell Chivayo in a country where despite having talent, most are poor. Bhutisi has graduated from Seh Calaz’s school of grovelling for freebies, and is now writing paragraphs and pages on Facebook begging for a car, after many years of making us see how broken the system is through satire. We know that what you cannot do does not exist God, so I ask that all these artists who have been gripped by greed one day wake up to realize that the system they are praising to get free cars from has so much blood on its hands. I also pray that one day they wake up to realize that the cars they begged for have serious consequences, but I pray that they realize that before they have sold their souls to the evil one. I pray God that they also realize that they are taking advantage of a man arikutonyisiwawo zvake nemujolo, who might be buying all these cars to comfort himself nekusiiwa nemukadzi. Nedziyavo dzakaita mbiri nekutevedzera Bhobho dzakutodawo mota yepiri for his imaginary motorcade, haa uya mutapudzirei kupenga kuite kushoma Mwari, before his head becomes too big and he ends up in trouble nevakabvisa Mugabe wacho. Tinotoziva Mwari kuti pamwe izvezvi Wicknell anorara achichema, uku omuka kuseni to find Bhutisi naDhuterere have written him long love letters, yet it is not the kind of love he wants. Zviri pano panyika Mwari huye bodo, tinomboonerera. Vaparidzi verenyu shoko vakati munhu haazopuhwi zvose, because nemari yose iya chokwadi Sonya akati zvepano ndaguta, sarai nerugare. Ungazoiti ndiyo Zanu iya inotambudza vanhu kana yokorobhewa nerurimi nemaartists kudero, haa as a country we deserve that party. Dzimwe ihasha dzinondibata, musazozvitora henyu serious Tenzi.
While I do not want to dwell on trivialities like Chivayo and his vain disciples, I want to pray for the tired and heavy-laden. Makati imi kuna Mateo huyai kwandiri makaneta makaremerwa, ndivava vana venyu mateacher ehurumende vari kungofamba vachitura befu nekutaura vega mumigwagwa umu. Easter is a time of joy and celebration that Christ died for our sins, but Mwari ndafunga mucivil servant akatarisana nerent, schools closing, neholiday iyoyi anodazve kutravella to be with family kumusha. Ndinongoti vapeiwo hope vakwanise kurara usiku vasawanza macalculations because they will end up thinking pane imwe mari iri kutorwa nezvikwambo. Hongu, zviriko zvikwambo mumaaccount avo ekubank zvinosanganisira tax plus zvimbadzo asi itai kuti vasanyanyofunga nezvazvo. I also want to pray for headmasters kuti vasapindwa nemweya wekuba mari dzechikoro because the parents who pay those fees vanototamburawo.
God, this Easter, I want to pray for zvivindi zvinenge zvaTshabangu zvekutoshaya nyadzi zvachose. Herozve rimwe rombe ramakadai kusimudza muguruva nhasi he is shaking hands with the president. We are not sure hedu sevanhu venyama if you are the one who put him where he is, but Jacob mushoko renyu takangoverenga zvechimbavha mbavha chake akazopedzisira aita baba vendudzi. Achingozhinya nekupupira muromo sedofo takatoona hoyo ava Senator. Maybe these things do not have a clear formula. But then again we hear and see Nero always referring to your word, and we keep the hope that one day his prayers will be answered. Pamwe imi, the all-knowing God munoziva kuti he may be using your name in vain, ko munombozvida here zvevanhu vanonyengedzera.
Again, Mwari Baba, may you give this country’s young people bravery to do the right things, kuSenegal uko zvakatofamba wani. Give these old madalas a conscience also to see the value in young people, not kungongwarira kuwawata, praising vekure kure kuSenegal uko while not seeing their own shortcomings. God, we are tired of a youth that just knows how to beg mbinga, gyrate at rallies, and getting drunk with illicit brews. These young people are growing into useless electorate Jehovah. Give these young men and women enough wisdom to say the right things not kuendera kujeri kuti hanzi nhingi iscud. Nanamai vedu Mwari, itai kuti vazivewo pekugumira Easter ino, kumakereke uko vaise mutsauko wezvavanoita kumarally eZanu nekukereke dzvene, although we know hedu kuti you are omnipresent munenge muchivaona henyu vachitambisa zviuno kuti vapihwe mota and they go on to wear church uniforms kuti vadye Paseka. Give Mai Phiri the preacher energy to dance kuEaster conference, the same energy she had when she was dancing Mai Welly kurally kuya kuya.
God, protect those who will travel on our potholed roads. Also protect those gathering mumisangano from cholera and other diseases asingadi kuona pakaunganiwa, zvikagoti zvipatara hakuna, ringaita basa Jehovah. Bvisai kukara mavari and give them discipline varege kungoshamira zvese zvese pachikafu apa, vangapera nemidumbu.
Komboreraiwo John munyowani watava naye kuRBZ uko mubvise nhema from his vocabulary like the old John Panonetsa who even swore that bond notes were going to work, but chero nechana chavendor kuno kuChitima ukarasha dutu rawo hachinongi, chinotoziva kuti haitengi. Vapei integrity VaMushayavanhu avo, vasafanana nemapredecessor avo whose legacies spell nothing but failure. Neimwe nhambo I actually think being made RBZ governor is being set up for failure, but what do I know, ndiri wenyama.
Here in Masvingo God, during this holiday help our councillors to drink responsibly, if they should drink at all, kunyanya our female councillors who we see vakadzvinya mabhotoro ehutsvuku. Even the male councillors Lord, vatsiurei vagone kuremekedza mhuri dzavo. Protect our city fathers, macouncilor iwaya from getting injured while they dance on TiTok hameno kuti vanenge vachifarirei, maybe mabenefits ari kunyanyonaka, asi chingovaprotectai henyu She.
Concluding this prayer, God give our leaders a conscience, integrity and remind them that they are not gods. Itaiwo kuti Zesa ive nemoyo wetsitsi holiday ino. Murange madhara arikuroodza nekuroora vana vadiki. Give me good bananas nechibage chisina kupfukutwa chekukanga for lunch ndiwane simba rekutsiura mbavha dzeZanu. Aah before I go Mwari, komboreraiwo naVaMphoko kwavari ikoko, tichingoti dai vaitwawo zvakaitwa Killer wedu wekwaZivhu naiye Chombo chakadai kumboparadza nyika, asi mugumire pana Mphoko henyu Mwari ana musorobhangu and crew ngavagareko. Ndongoti dai matipa moyo sewaKudzai Chipanga wekugona kuzvininipisa tichipfidza matadzo edu zvaakaita gore riya neapolojersey. Ndichingoti kana ndamareva mukutenda, Amen!!